1.1 ROOTS:Returning to What Holds You

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Season One

ROOTS : Returning to What Holds You

Alhamdulillah, for every season of life, for the moments of ease and the moments of struggle, Allah ta'ala has placed roots within our hearts to guide us, steady us, and bring us back to Him.

A woman does not fall apart overnight. She weakens slowly, when her roots begin to loosen.

Roots are not visible, yet they hold everything together. When a woman is rooted, she bends without breaking. When she is uprooted, even small winds feel unbearable. And in a world that constantly asks women to be more, do more, and hold more, very few are asked a more essential question:

What are you rooted in?

From the teenage girl trying to understand herself, to the woman who has spent years holding her family together, every woman lives from her roots. These roots shape how she thinks, how she loves, how she copes, and how she returns to herself after breaking.

What Do “Roots” Really Mean?

Roots are not your roles.

They are not your achievements.

They are not how productive, patient, or put-together you appear.

Roots are what you turn to when no one is watching.

They are where your heart seeks safety.

They are what defines your worth when you fail.

From an Islamic lens, a woman’s roots lie in her fitrah, her original, Allah-given nature, and in a conscious connection with her Creator. From a psychological lens, roots are shaped through early attachment, beliefs about self-worth, and emotional safety.

Together, these roots determine whether a woman lives grounded… or constantly unsettled.

Every Woman Has Roots. Even If She Never Chose Them

No woman grows without roots. The question is not whether she has them, but where they come from.

Some roots are shaped by:

• Childhood experiences
• Family expectations
• Praise or criticism
• Abandonment or over-responsibility
• Being loved conditionally or inconsistently

Many women do not consciously choose their roots, they adapt to survive. And survival roots can keep you standing for years… but they also keep you exhausted.

This is why so many capable, sincere women feel deeply tired without knowing why.

When Roots Are Healthy, and When They Are Not Healthy

Healthy roots do not make life easy, but they make the heart steady.

A woman with healthy roots:

• Can say no without drowning in guilt
• Bends under pressure without losing herself
• Feels emotions without being ruled by them
• Relies on Allah even when people fail her
Weak roots often show up quietly:• Chronic overthinking
• Fear of disappointing others
• People-pleasing at the cost of self
• Spiritual inconsistency
• Anxiety without a clear cause

These are not character flaws. They are signs of misplaced anchoring.

Why Modern Women Feel So Unsettled?

Women today carry more roles than ever before: daughter, student, wife, mother, professional, caregiver... often all at once. Yet very few are taught how to remain rooted while carrying so much.

Psychology tells us that when emotional safety is sought externally, burnout becomes inevitable. Islam teaches us something even deeper:

The heart was never meant to rest anywhere except in reliance upon Allah.

When a woman looks for stability in people, validation, control, or perfection, she will always feels afraid of losing it.

Allah ta'ala: The Only True Source of Stability

Allah describes a good word as a tree, firm in its roots, reaching the sky with its branches. A woman whose heart is grounded in trust in Allah may still struggle, but she is not uprooted by every storm.

Tawakkul is not passivity. It is placing your trust in the One who does not change.

Returning to Allah does not mean you failed.

It means you remembered where you belong.

A Gentle Beginning

This season is not about fixing everything. It is not about becoming a different woman.

It is about noticing.

About returning.

About tending to your roots where they were once neglected.

You do not need to rise yet.

First, you need to strengthen what holds you.

And every true rise begins quietly, from within.

Tracing my Roots

Take a quiet moment with yourself.

• When life feels heavy, where does my heart usually seek safety or reassurance?
• What experiences or relationships have shaped how I see my worth today?
• What would it look like for me to rely on Allah more consciously in my daily life, even in small ways?

Stay connected.

This is only the beginning of the Roots season. We will walk this journey slowly, honestly, and together. In shaa Allah!

With Duas

Amina Chahal

Islamic Life Coach, Life skills Trainer